Alki – What you will become after your home becomes a boat anchor
Belltown – Experience fine dining while warding off homeless and addicts
Capitol Hill – Enjoy wearing your fauxhawk while calling 9-11
Denny-ile – Denial over the negative appreciation in your recent downtown Seattle condo purchase
Eastside – Close to Microsoft. Location, Location, Location
Fremont – Hippies have been displaced by hipsters
Goldilocks – Seattle RE is not too hot or cold – it’s just right!
House poor – A condition many Seattleites may find themselves facing in 2007.
Irrational District – Someone needs to open a pizza joint up in this mug and fast
Jobs – Becoming increasingly scarce in any field related to real estate and other sectors tied to consumer spending starting in 2007
Klondike Gold Rush Museum – History of yet another asset bubble
Lake Washington – It’s great if you have the $2M entrance fee
Mudslides – Increasing property values since 1901
Neighborhoods – If you can afford them, Seattle has some nice ones
Occidental Park – see Belltown
Pike Place Market – Much ballyhooed place for bruised fish and pan handling
Queen Anne – In need of a 40% haircut
Renting – A wise alternative to buying in this market. Have a little patience and buy beautiful Queen Anne view homes for pennies on the dollar by 2009.
Sailboat – A great place to live after your house capsizes
Tooth & Nail – How you’ll be fighting to make the payments on your 1960’s boxy Ballard money pit
Unemployment – What goes up when consumer spending goes down as a result of the housing bust
Vulcan – A company that consistently makes wise investment decisions
Weather – A major draw for the “equity locusts” of California
XXX – A city so liberal it proposes ridiculous laws (4 foot rule)
Y – Why not buy a house today?
Zoning – New zoning laws will finally allow all those Vancouver-like condos to be built downtown, thus cementing our bubble-proof status .
A parody of this post.