Aubrey Cohen comes at us today with a frank and sometimes amusing look at real estate agents’ habit of massaging the English language to attempt to make their listings stand out in an increasingly larger sea of properties for sale. Of special note in today’s article is the copious quoting of local agent Ira Sacharoff, a regular commenter here on Seattle Bubble. Congrats, Ira!
It’s harder to lure buyers these days thanks to an increasing number of listings and a smaller pool of buyers — five homes listed for every pending sale last month in Seattle, up from three listings per sale a year earlier.
So in addition to lowering prices, throwing in TVs and cars, and doing their best to spiff up homes before putting them on the market, sellers and their agents are reaching new levels of creativity with the first thing agents and potential buyers usually see — the listing blurb.
…agents tend to emphasize the positive. Another Central District listing, for instance, leads with its location, proclaiming: “Here’s the opportunity to live in one of the most sought-after neighborhoods in the Seattle area.”
Then, a spin on the less-than-stunning interior: “Seller has left you to your own imagination!”
Another listing promises an “excellent location” close to shopping, schools, a bus line and Interstate 5. They’re not kidding: I-5 is 50 yards away.
Skyline Properties agent Ira Sacharoff is blunt in his assessment of listing descriptions: “They’re mostly lies.”
Less-than-truthful assertions can include a “Ballard” neighborhood home that’s really in Crown Hill, a basement “bedroom” that’s just big enough for a cot and has no exit window, and “gleaming hardwood floors” that are actually fir (a softwood) or laminate.
You know what they say, though. You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a crappy little dump on a tiny plot in a bland neighborhood with a half-million-dollar asking price. Er, well, the saying is something like that, anyway.
If the subject of this article, and the “listing language decoder” at the end of the piece sound familiar, it may be because we’ve discussed this subject before, almost exactly one year ago. Be sure to check out Eleua’s Real Estate Agent Rosetta Stone.
(Aubrey Cohen, Seattle P-I, 11.21.2007)